THURSDAY 2

This day has been hard. I woke up angry and wrote a shitty Facebook post about the construction noise coming from next door. I mean, the noise at 7 a.m. was the tipping point, but then I looked out the window and saw an entire construction crew in the driveway and there were excavators moving up and down the street which made the windows of our house vibrate and I fixated on that. 

What is really happening is, I want things to go back to normal. I don’t want to be locked up in my house with my family and avoiding whatever people I happen to see when I’m out for a run. I want my kids to come out of their bedrooms. I want all of the people who have suddenly discovered the bogs and trails behind our house to pick up their bags of dog shit and take them home with them. What kind of human drops their bag of dog shit on someone’s lawn and keeps walking? While I'm at it, what kind of petty fool bitches about their neighbor's home improvement noise on Facebook?

I can’t believe that I’m watching a ticker on the bottom of my television screen that lists -in real time - the number of dead. This is reality.

Somewhere around 3:30, my anger broke. Alone in the kitchen, I felt the sting of tears and made the decision to just let them come.